Authenticity: Being More You

Who am I...really?

Such a simple question on the surface is not simple at all. The truth is, most of us have difficulty answering this question beyond labels such as our name, age, nationality, occupation etc. A deeper way to ask this question is what really moves you? What do you stand for? What do you really care about? Or how do you want to be remembered when you're no longer here?

A little dramatic perhaps, but these are important questions - “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are” (Carl Jung). They require real reflection and introspection to understand who you are as a unique individual. Your answers can act as a compass to guide how you spend your time and with whom. To make decisions both big and small: from what should I eat for lunch to should I leave my relationship?

Digging deep to find these answers can help you live each day with more meaning and purpose. To live a life worth living, according to you. It is also the first step to finding your zone of sustainable performance.

The First Step Towards Sustainable Performance

Lack of clarity around your personal values can lead to feelings of "drifting" through life or "hammering" away at work. Have you taken the time recently to define your core values? Are you able to say what your top three values are right now? Can you identify how these values are reflected (or not reflected) in the decisions you make?

If you can, that’s awesome, because most of us have trouble doing so.

The ancient saying “know thyself” is arguably more difficult now than ever in the age of social media and targeted algorithms. Competing voices and digital noise can make it hard to get in touch with yourself. By doing a core values exercise with genuine introspection you'll likely find it’s not easy to whittle down three hundred possible core values down to three that most represent you. You'll effectively be forced to have a conversation with yourself to clarify what really matters to you, and gain clarity on what to focus on.

Clarity of personal values precedes the conviction to walk to the beat of your own drum and not someone else’s – are you moving in your direction or one influenced by your parents, peers, society, or mobile phone. Don’t feel bad if your answer is one or a combination of the latter or “I’m not sure” (the most common answer), channel that realisation into clarifying your values.

Authenticity - Translating your Values into Action

It's easy to do the exercise, define your values then forget about them. Being your authentic self means living out your values through actions and decisions you make daily. How can a single (and somewhat abstract) word like "Health" or "Family" translate into a tangible action?

Identifying what direction your value represents is the first step. A direction is an on-going process that can never be crossed-off or marked as 'done'. To move towards your direction, you must take actions and achieve goals that can be crossed off as 'done'.

A common trap that high-performers fall into is to focus on the ambitious long-term goal and not define the small daily actions that build towards it. The bigger the long-term goal, the more discouraging it is each day it isn't achieved. By focusing on the daily actions and tracking them when done, you can create a positive feedback loop to give you more motivation and energy to keep you moving in the right direction. Whether the long-term goal is achieved or not, is of lesser importance. The journey of living your authentic self is greater than the destination.

This article is Part 2 of 4 of a guide to Sustainable Performance: a Primer for Building your own Mental and Emotional Fitness Regime. Read our previous post (Part1) for the overview of the Sustainable Performance Framework.

In our next article (Part 3 of 4) we will focus on the second dimension of sustainable performance - Results or Taking Effective Action. Taking the "right" actions aligned with your authentic self over the long-term requires effective management of energy levels and supportive habits that allow you to grow by taking balanced risks from the edge of comfort.